Dear Abby, January 23 2024: “My friend doesn’t know why she and her husband don’t have many friends. I know why.”
Why do the columnists keep doing this?
Link to the original letter here.
My take: To recap, the LW’s friend is unhappy that she and her husband have few friends. The LW says it’s because the friend’s husband “takes over every conversation, bragging about himself and the people he knows.” Now the LW’s friend wants the LW’s husband to befriend her husband, but her husband can’t stand the guy. The LW doesn’t know…it is time for her to say something?
Abby says she should tell her friend about “her husband’s need to dominate the conversation and brag about his accomplishments.”
The LW can take Abby’s advice if she likes, but it’s only fair to let her know that if she does, she will destroy the friendship. Columnists are constantly suggesting you level with the people who annoy you, but Reader, this never works. Or, it might fix the behavior, but you’re never going to know, because after they politely thank you for your candor, you’ll never hear from them again.
This situation calls for some vaguely sympathetic, non-committal murmuring. It calls, in short, for Miss Manners. The LW wrote to the wrong columnist.
Chance this letter is fake: Probably it’s real. But I sure hope she doesn’t take Abby’s advice.