Consider this scenario. Gifted genius. Has a girlfriend. Boy and girl both 16. Boy already has his own money because he's a gifted genius. Wants to marry his girlfriend instead of sneaking around. Do you approve?
Interesting scenario, Joshua! But I still don't approve. I'm a lot friendlier to young marriage than most people, but 16 is too young, in my book. Brilliance and financial readiness are not the same as maturity.
Fair enough. How about 17-20? I myself got married at 25 because of circumstances beyond my control. If I had met my wife a lot younger I'd probably be a lot less anxious than I was.
This is one of the many situations where parents can and do have various points of view. No one wants to be a square, but in this situation, doors remain open. They are still boys. Parents house; parents rules. It really is for the best.
I think once you get to about 20, marriage starts being feasible for some people. But there's a lot of individual variation, and cultural variation starts to kick in, too. There are some cultures, mostly religious, where people marry young, and get the structure and support they need. It didn't seem like this family was in that category, though.
This is a delicate subject. If one is against premarital sex, one can not arbitrarily demand someone wait to long. Speaking from experience being celibate until almost 26 can warp the mind. That feeling stays forever.
Consider this scenario. Gifted genius. Has a girlfriend. Boy and girl both 16. Boy already has his own money because he's a gifted genius. Wants to marry his girlfriend instead of sneaking around. Do you approve?
Interesting scenario, Joshua! But I still don't approve. I'm a lot friendlier to young marriage than most people, but 16 is too young, in my book. Brilliance and financial readiness are not the same as maturity.
Fair enough. How about 17-20? I myself got married at 25 because of circumstances beyond my control. If I had met my wife a lot younger I'd probably be a lot less anxious than I was.
This is one of the many situations where parents can and do have various points of view. No one wants to be a square, but in this situation, doors remain open. They are still boys. Parents house; parents rules. It really is for the best.
Your answer has nuance and rationale. I appreciate that.
I think once you get to about 20, marriage starts being feasible for some people. But there's a lot of individual variation, and cultural variation starts to kick in, too. There are some cultures, mostly religious, where people marry young, and get the structure and support they need. It didn't seem like this family was in that category, though.
This is a delicate subject. If one is against premarital sex, one can not arbitrarily demand someone wait to long. Speaking from experience being celibate until almost 26 can warp the mind. That feeling stays forever.
Understood.
It's nice to be understood.